Motherhood from Another Perspective #5

First I want to thank Mommy Chris for inviting me to be her guest blogger here at Mommy Journey. I’m so honored and proud to be her GB here.

Anyway I’m Denise, 21 years old and yes I’m a mother. 🙂 Most of you may not know that I’m a single parent. I became mother to my son Yuwel when I was 19. Maybe some of you would agree that being a parent is a tough job how much more if you were at my age , a single mom and does not even have any idea on raising a kid.

I can still remember how flabbergasted I was when I saw the two red lines from the store bought pregnancy kit. From that moment on I can already see my life drastically changing from a typical college girl to a soon to be mom. My boyfriend back then knew everything about it and wants to tie the knot with me right then and there. But I turn down the proposal. I know that what we have done was a false move and so I do not want to add any more mistakes in my life. Then that I decided to break up with him. But hey, that’s a different story; let’s just talk about it sometime. J But basically, that is how I turn out to be a single mom.

I can say that for me, the pregnancy is the hardest part on being a solo parent. I can’t even count how many sad tissues I have wasted because of crying. There were times before that I felt despised and rejected. How I wish I listened to my parents advices. My confidence decreases and I just felt so embarrassed and disgraced about myself. But things do change; because of constantly praying and talking to the Lord I started to accept the facts that I made a mistake. I ask for forgiveness to the Lord for what I did. From then on, things got a little better.

Then the big day arrived, I was rushed by my parents to the hospital. After 8 hours of labor I got to meet my firstborn. When I first laid my eyes on him, all the hurt and hardship that is within me vanished. I nearly cried because of happiness. But after that the real responsibilities of being a mom kicks me. I was taught how to breastfeed, to change nappies, everything that I need to know. It was really hard for me at first because I have to know and do it on my own. The good thing was through all those times, my mom was there to guide me. She helped me through a lot of things. She is always there patiently teaching me everything I need to know about motherhood. My whole family (dad, mom & 2 brothers) are always there for me and my son. What more can I say, I’m just blessed with a supportive family.

But then something happened last March 2008. I received a text from my ex boyfriend’s mom. They said that they have to talk to me because something bad happened to my ex. I didn’t entertain her; I told myself that it was just a ploy so my ex and I could maybe talk. I didn’t think that it was that serious. But it turned out that my ex boyfriend passed away and they asked if we could visit them. I don’t want to believe it at first. In my mind, there’s someone telling me that it was still a trick. But it was all true. We went to the wake (as advised by older relatives and some church mates). From there, we were informed that he died because of Intestinal Obstruction. His mom (mother of my ex), seeing Yuwel for the first time was so happy, even his whole family. They even asked if they could visit or if we could go there again sometime. Sadly for them, us going there, was all for the closure. After that, I decided to finally close my doors for them.

Up until now, I don’t know if I made the right decision. Although I know that in time if it turned out that my decision is wrong, I know that Lord will be there to sustain me. For the mean time, I have to do and perform the task of being a parent on my own. I just have to shower Yuwel with all the love that I could give.

I, being a young single mom had gone through so many struggles (breaking ups, death of my son’s father, not being able to finish college) in life. But with the help of the people at church, my relatives and of course the Lord I’m blessed that I surpassed them all. I know that I’m just at the beginning of learning and experiencing the joys and pains of motherhood. I’m excited and looking forward to it. But right now, I’m just enjoying my life as a happy single mom.

Denise is a young lad trying to perform the task of being a friend, playmate, dad, and mom to his son Yuwel. She is the author of My Son and My Life.

Comments

  1. I enjoyed your guest.

  2. I agree w/ M.s Denise,being a parent is really a tough one,but not as tough as Ms.Denise’s facing right now.And I really adore her.I was nearly get into tears & broke my heart upon reading this & thought how dreadful & hard it is to raise a son alone by herself.I’m just wishing & praying for her & her son as well to have their family back into pieces

  3. JesuLalaine says:

    very touching real life story.. I can’t image how she has gone through everything..but I admire her strength and I believe it’s all God’s grace and love. God bless to Denise and Yuwel!Lalaine’s WorldFrom Asia and BeyondDay to Day MiraclesTrying to be FitNot a Shopaholic

  4. Mommy Chris! 🙂 thanks again for having me as your guest blogger. and thanks for all your comments! 🙂

  5. SASSY MOM says:

    It's nice to hear that you have remained tough and found strength among your family and friends but most especially in the Lord.

    God bless you and your family!

  6. Oh, my Gawd.. Denise!!! This is very touching. I don't know if i'd be sorry or what.. but you made me realize a lot of things. You are my idol!!! you are very strong! I don't know how I'd be able to handle what you've gone and going through. good luck.

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