Strong Willed Kids

Here is our parenting tip for the week! Read on!

Children who make decisions with intensity tend to be labeled “strong-willed.” At the end of the day, their parents feel as if they’ve been engaged in hand-to-hand combat—and that the child often wins at the parent’s expense! Most parents consider a strong will a negative personality trait because it often creates resistance and frustration in family life. Yet, in reality, it’s the strong-willed kids who are often better equipped to succeed, be creative, and face adversity.

Children with strong wills have the potential to become the next generation of leaders. They have their own ideas and plans. They know what they want. They’re persistent, confident, passionate, and determined to succeed at whatever they choose to do.

Leaders have an agenda, look for ways to incorporate others into their plans, and have a high need for control in life. Balanced with graciousness, leaders become a treasure because they make things happen, create organization out of chaos, and motivate people to action.

Unfortunately, it’s hard to raise a leader. These kids tend to have their own ways of doing things and like to tell other people (including their parents) what to do. A strong will keeps a child moving in a certain direction in spite of obstacles. Often these children need bigger barriers or tighter limits to teach them that those boundaries are firm.

Don’t be discouraged by the effort it takes to teach a strong-willed child which limits not to push. The strong-willed child accomplishes things in life, because the roadblocks that might hold others back are no match for this kid’s determination. Your job is to help him know the difference between obstacles to overcome and limits to live within.

A strong will can be an asset… as long as the heart is in the right place.

This parenting tip is from the book, Parenting is Heart Workby Dr. Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller, RN, BSN.


  1. I do have a strong-willed kid in my hands and sometimes it's quite challenging to set limits for her.

  2. I've also read this mommy, from the Strong-Willed Child by dr. Bobson. The other type is the compliant Child.

    My daughter is a strong-willed child. I realized this when she was barely two years old. It is always a battle to make her obey but I make sure that I win the battle. Otherwise, she will no longer obey me for the rest of her life. I also pray for God's wisdom how to deal with my daughter gently yet firm. Because I am aware that I can make or break my daughter in the molding process.

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