My Journey to Motherhood Post

Motherhood from Another Perspective #6

Hello everyone , My Name is JoyD of a Whenmomtalks…First of all I want to give my appreciation to Mommy Chris for inviting me to be a part of her blog,, It is such a pleasure to share my views and tips of motherhood…

They say that it is tough to be a mom or mum as they say here in Oz ..
Tough job, demanding but fulfilling at the same time.. I had been a single mum for 7 years, it was tough looking after Micah , I am so greatful to my mother who help me raised my eldest, a twist of luck turned and I met my SOULMATE it was fate that brought us together and it was a good love story ( well , that would be a different topic,, just follow me on my blog at )

I got married at the age of 30 and had Braiden at the age of 33, then followed by Bianca 2 years later. Our precious lil boy was a bit different , my heart was broken when he was disgnosed with mild developmental delay with mild autism (you can read his story here )

It was heartbreaking as my son went through a lot of mood changes , tantrums since he cannot speak and express his feelings when he was young , I have to take him to therapies, speech therapy and playgroup, I am always there for him for support and unconditional love , sooner than we think he was changing everyday , word explosion, attention span had lengthened and I am HAPPY to say that he is doing GREAT!!!!!! He had settled well in school , he is very affectionate , caring and loving boy, I just think that it was a miracle considering how hard I struggle with him when he was around 3 , he is just a totally different boy,, and dunno if he still fits with his diagnosis, still,, no matter what, BRAIDEN is still our sweet boy and we love him to bits…..

That was Braidens part , now I am trying to juggle motherhood taking care of school age kids and then a 15 year old teenager… whoa…. It is a roller coaster ride!!!!!!
I know that it is hard to keep up with teenagers , there are things that we disagree , must be a cultural differences but now I know how my Mum went through when I were on that age ,, now I appreciate all her wisdom and teachings.

And how about Bianca ?? she is a smart lil cookie ,and her personality is shining through as she grows up and getting ready for big school next year, she knows that I am a mum that she can count on…

No matter how many children we have , and how different they are , I know that we all LOVE our precious lil ones…
That’s what motherhood is all about, giving LOVE, comfort, guidance ,discipline and security .
I believe that CONFIDENCE is a key to effective parenting. Confident parents are positive and positive parents are very powerful people. It promotes effective discipline, which improves children’s behaviour and in the long term, forms much of the basis for the child’s own self confidence….
I am not a perfect MUM there is no such thing but I am doing my best with the help of my loving husband Joe and we both wanted the BEST for our children …

I wish everyone a lovely day and all the best!!!!
Once again Thank you Chris!!!!! Hope to meet you someday ……

Motherhood from Another Perspective #5

First I want to thank Mommy Chris for inviting me to be her guest blogger here at Mommy Journey. I’m so honored and proud to be her GB here.

Anyway I’m Denise, 21 years old and yes I’m a mother. 🙂 Most of you may not know that I’m a single parent. I became mother to my son Yuwel when I was 19. Maybe some of you would agree that being a parent is a tough job how much more if you were at my age , a single mom and does not even have any idea on raising a kid.

I can still remember how flabbergasted I was when I saw the two red lines from the store bought pregnancy kit. From that moment on I can already see my life drastically changing from a typical college girl to a soon to be mom. My boyfriend back then knew everything about it and wants to tie the knot with me right then and there. But I turn down the proposal. I know that what we have done was a false move and so I do not want to add any more mistakes in my life. Then that I decided to break up with him. But hey, that’s a different story; let’s just talk about it sometime. J But basically, that is how I turn out to be a single mom.

I can say that for me, the pregnancy is the hardest part on being a solo parent. I can’t even count how many sad tissues I have wasted because of crying. There were times before that I felt despised and rejected. How I wish I listened to my parents advices. My confidence decreases and I just felt so embarrassed and disgraced about myself. But things do change; because of constantly praying and talking to the Lord I started to accept the facts that I made a mistake. I ask for forgiveness to the Lord for what I did. From then on, things got a little better.

Then the big day arrived, I was rushed by my parents to the hospital. After 8 hours of labor I got to meet my firstborn. When I first laid my eyes on him, all the hurt and hardship that is within me vanished. I nearly cried because of happiness. But after that the real responsibilities of being a mom kicks me. I was taught how to breastfeed, to change nappies, everything that I need to know. It was really hard for me at first because I have to know and do it on my own. The good thing was through all those times, my mom was there to guide me. She helped me through a lot of things. She is always there patiently teaching me everything I need to know about motherhood. My whole family (dad, mom & 2 brothers) are always there for me and my son. What more can I say, I’m just blessed with a supportive family.

But then something happened last March 2008. I received a text from my ex boyfriend’s mom. They said that they have to talk to me because something bad happened to my ex. I didn’t entertain her; I told myself that it was just a ploy so my ex and I could maybe talk. I didn’t think that it was that serious. But it turned out that my ex boyfriend passed away and they asked if we could visit them. I don’t want to believe it at first. In my mind, there’s someone telling me that it was still a trick. But it was all true. We went to the wake (as advised by older relatives and some church mates). From there, we were informed that he died because of Intestinal Obstruction. His mom (mother of my ex), seeing Yuwel for the first time was so happy, even his whole family. They even asked if they could visit or if we could go there again sometime. Sadly for them, us going there, was all for the closure. After that, I decided to finally close my doors for them.

Up until now, I don’t know if I made the right decision. Although I know that in time if it turned out that my decision is wrong, I know that Lord will be there to sustain me. For the mean time, I have to do and perform the task of being a parent on my own. I just have to shower Yuwel with all the love that I could give.

I, being a young single mom had gone through so many struggles (breaking ups, death of my son’s father, not being able to finish college) in life. But with the help of the people at church, my relatives and of course the Lord I’m blessed that I surpassed them all. I know that I’m just at the beginning of learning and experiencing the joys and pains of motherhood. I’m excited and looking forward to it. But right now, I’m just enjoying my life as a happy single mom.

Denise is a young lad trying to perform the task of being a friend, playmate, dad, and mom to his son Yuwel. She is the author of My Son and My Life.

Motherhood from Another Perspective #4

My guest blogger today is Salen. To most of you, you know her as the author of Sassy Mom’s Corner. I truly enjoy her posts so I decided to invite her to be my guest today.

Enjoying Motherhood

Hi, I’m Salen. First off, I would like to thank Chris for giving me the opportunity to be a guest blogger. I am thrilled to share with you some parenting tips I have gathered from friends, research and of course, mostly from my personal experience.

I am blessed to be a mother to two wonderful children – a girl and a boy. I would have wanted to have more but after 3 miscarriages, I believe that the Lord is sending me a message to focus all my attention to these two beautiful creatures. My eldest daughter is now 14 years old and my son is already ten.

Being a mother is an arduous undertaking but is a very fulfilling and noble one. I, for one was brought up to a career person, however giving birth to a child certainly changes a woman’s perspective. More than once, I have chosen my family over my career and for the last time early this year, I told myself I’m done choosing – – I am now a stay-at-home mom, trying to earn from home.

One of the most important lessons I have gained through the years of being a mom is to “enjoy motherhood”. How do we as moms do that, I have come up with 5 tips.

  • Enjoy your kids. – You can not enjoy motherhood without enjoying your kids. Take pleasure in snuggling and cuddling your children. Remember the time you can do that to them is very limited. I know that for a fact since I am now raising a teenager. Although my daughter and I still bond together but it’s different when they are toddlers and you can just smell their armpits, be cozy with them and kiss them everywhere and anytime you want.
  • Weekends are for the family. – This is one of the reasons why I had to give up my corporate life. We all know for a fact that times are really hard nowadays and my hubby has taken upon himself to get a weekend job, only during Saturdays. With this in mind, knowing the rigors of my corporate schedule, I had to quit. I believe that one parent should be there for my children. Our children require enormous amounts of love, understanding, nurturing and guidance. No amount of money can replace that.
  • Involve yourself in your child’s life. Be it in school or after school activities, make certain that you take time to be there for them. This will enable you to see your children’s progress and stay attuned to whatever difficulty or special needs they require. Being there for your children increases their sense of security making them more assure of your love and will turn boost their self-confidence.
  • Take time out to know your children. – We know that although our children all came from one tree, they are very different from one another. Their needs are very unique. One discipline strategy may work for one but may not necessarily work for the. I do these by dating my kids individually. Some parents I know with a lot of kids, try to do it in batches to be more practical.
  • Have a “Me” Day – or a day to pamper yourself. It can be a day out with friends, a day in the spa, or just a couple of hours to be by yourself. During one weekend, you can ask your hubby to take the children with him so you can have the time off. I did this with hubby and he truly enjoyed the bonding time. If you cannot afford the time to be out of your house, a few hours by alone before everyone wakes up is enough to recharge you everyday. Trust me you need this for sanity’s sake, even just a few minutes everyday. You cannot enjoy your being a parent if you’re always grumpy and irritated, and your children can definitely feel the heat.

Raising happy and healthy children can be a real challenge especially nowadays, where everything is fast-paced. We tend to neglect that our children need a lot of love and attention. That’s why whether you are working or a stay-at-home mom, at the end of the day, give the best to your family not what’s left of you.

Motherhood from Another Perspective #3

My guest blogger for this week is Andrea, she is the author of I hope you enjoy her post as much as I do!

Hi! My name is Andrea and I’m the mother of one son (so far!), Logan. He was born on April 18, 2008. I admire Chris as a mom, so I am honored to be a guest blogger here today!

Motherhood has been an amazing experience for me the past fifteen months. When I first had my son, the most common words I heard from others were, “Enjoy it because it goes too fast.” Wow, I understand! For me, the second year is going even faster than the first because he is moving so fast! Sometimes I get so busy working at Logan’s pace that I have to remind myself to stop – so that I can continue to savor our moments! This is hard even as a stay at home mom.

I didn’t realize until my son was ten months old that I had “too high” of expectations for myself. Until then, I had put forth 100% with a smile on my face every day being Logan’s mother – but that left 0% for me or my husband! At that point, my enthusiasm began to drop and I was extremely exhausted. Our families don’t live close enough to babysit, and I hadn’t felt comfortable hiring one. After having a very “down” month, I realized I needed to change my expectations to match my reality in order to continue being my best self and mom.

A week after Logan turned eleven months old, he began going to a babysitter’s house 8 hrs a week. He also began spending the entire weekend with my parents once a month. It was hard to admit I needed help. Even though that amount of time was peanuts in the grand scheme of things (we were still spending the majority of our time together, which was what was most important) – I felt like I must be a failure as a stay at home mom.

But after just four occasions at the babysitter’s, Logan no longer cried when I said goodbye – in fact, nowadays he can’t wait to run off with the other kids. When I pick him up, he smiles and waves to me, but waits five minutes before coming over to go home. It’s very obvious that he has so much fun there, it’s no different than if I dropped him off at a friend’s house one day a week. I realize I did something positive for the both of us. Not only is he getting to play with different toys in a different environment, but I find various things to do by myself during those hours that give me new energy so that I can happily chase my energizer bunny around when he comes home.

Are you putting unnecessary pressure on yourself with a situation in your own life? Sometimes what we thought was best in our mind doesn’t turn out to be in real life. Instead, we may discover that if we make an adjustment to our original plan, we will be the most successful!

My blog is all about this theme – from my pregnancy (that for some reason I thought was going to be fun. . .however, my definition of fun doesn’t include all-day, debilitating sickness for the first one-and-a-half trimesters and excruciating back pain for the last one-and-a-half), childbirth (my plan had been to do it natural, and after I dilated in just three hours I thought the hard part was behind me. However, my son was posterior and my pelvis was small, so it took an additional four hours to push him out! The only way, since I didn’t want a c-section, was to get an epidural so that my doctor could help pull him out), breastfeeding (I thought since it was natural it wouldn’t end up being the hardest thing I’ve ever done in my life for nine months!), and raising my son (I thought the first year would be overwhelming and I’d get post partum depression. Instead, I was on a high! I found motherhood surprisingly easy and natural. Since that eleventh month, though, when he started going to the sitter’s, I’ve been thankful I get a break each week.)

I love being a mom and can’t imagine that there is anything in life more worthwhile. I used to think my purpose was being a writer, but after having my son I truly know what life is really about. I thank God every day for blessing me with the greatest experience on earth!