Communication Levels

With the rise of Internet usage and social networking, it is so easy to believe that we are communicating well enough with one another but I believe that now more than ever, more people are more lonely amidst all these social networking buzz. They lack proper communication within the family and this lurking around social networking gives them a false sense of closeness and connectedness to another.

As a parent, one of my goals why I wanted to be stay at home mom is because I want to foster a close and open relationship with my kids. I grew up from a home which didn’t have the closeness I was hoping for so I didn’t want it to happen to my kids and me. I read this email a few days ago and it really made sense, so I am sharing it with you as well.

Communication is at the center of all relationships. Closeness is communicated in many ways, and people give and receive love differently. Five levels of communication provide opportunities for increased closeness in family life. Each level serves an important role for growing deeper. If tension and stress dominate your relationship with your child, start working through these communication levels and you’ll begin to see significant change take place.

1. Greetings are the oil that keep relationships cordial. Hugging your children as part of a greeting or welcoming them to breakfast in the morning makes an important statement about the value of your relationship.

2. Exchanging information about our lives helps people know what’s going on and contributes to a sense of connectedness. As you go through your day, think of a couple of interesting things you could share with your child.

3. Sharing opinions and judgments is the next level. Some people are hesitant to share their opinions because they feel like they’ll have to back them up or face an argument. Look for ways to affirm your children. “That makes sense” can be an encouraging statement even if you disagree. “Thank you for sharing your opinion with me,” can be a statement that encourages openness.

4. Communicating emotions takes us another level deeper. Facts and opinions often have emotions hidden behind them. “I bet that hurt” or “I can tell you’re excited about that,” acknowledges feelings your child might be experiencing.

5. Sharing spiritually brings an amazing amount of closeness into a relationship. Praying together, sharing what God is teaching you, enjoying worship together, and having a sense of spiritual fellowship are all ways to enjoy the deepest level of communication. As you strengthen your spiritual lives together, you’ll see more and more opportunities to discuss heart issues.

All five levels of communication are important. Don’t think you can skip the first few and still experience closeness. Look for opportunities to enjoy all the levels with your kids.

This parenting tip comes from the book series, Parenting is Heart Work by Dr Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller.


  1. agree!
    I am trying to practice that in my daughter..
    I also grow in a family na hindi uso yung mga hug hug na yan at mga kiss kiss..sometimes nakailang talaga..but since i am trying to be a good mom with Iris.. sinusubukan ko talaga yan..hehee..

  2. that was a very informative post, thanks so much for sharing..

    by the way, do you mind checking out on A Teacher Pays Tribute?

  3. This is a very insightful post. I never knew there were levels of communication. I am definitely going to apply these to my kid… and maybe to my significant other as well? 🙂

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